You might be too old to Trick or Treat If.....

1. Jeff recognized you as one of his very disturbing frequent fliers!

2. You come up to my doorstep holding hands and flirting with your significant other!

3. You hit puberty before Y-2-K.

4. You shaved your Five O'Clock shadow before you hit the streets.

5. You are only 12 years old but are lactating and using your newborn as a prop!

6. You drove yourself to our neighborhood.

7. You are old enough to get into the local bar/strip club and look like you are an employee.

8. We can't decide if your teeth are real, or fake Billy-Bobs!

9. You are dressed as Beer Keg!

10. You have a "C" Cup.


Tonight, we were given an education on Trick or Treating in our new neighborhood. It was crazy with probably 400+ guests. I think we only recognized about 1/4 of the children--disguised adults. But, as the night rolled on the trick-or-treaters got OLDER and SCARIER!(hence our top 10 list) I think next year we will put up a quaint little sign saying 12 and under please. (This sounds a little harsh, but trust me it was outrageous, insane and completely ridiculous!) We however, completely enjoyed the entertainment.

Note to self...when trick or treaters come and confess that they would like to have a treat for their baby, but didn't want to bring the stroller up our steep 2 steps....make them produce the child before they take a handful!


(Oh, and by the way Jon & Jolyn, I am so not referring to you --when you visited Jeff & I one Halloween after a HS cross country meet! You two totally pulled off being 10 & 11. Oh, the good old days!)