My kids have probably watched THIS VIDEO 1,000 times since Thanksgiving. The catchy tune is starting to reek havoc on my 2 brain cells. I though I'd share the wealth!

The last day of TWO!

I love this SWEET BOY. As of tomorrow he will no longer be TWO.

 

 

I love
his funny sense of humor,
his Zest for life,
his inability to say his R's, F's and C's,
his use of pronouns,
his independence,
his love for his siblings,
his pot belly,
and
the way he detests being called LITTLE.

He is big and can't wait to be bigger!
(Slow down little, little boy! You are growing way too fast!)

Ohhhh, and he finished his last day of the "Terrible Two"s in style by sneaking into the Chapel while waiting for Tithing Settlement. He found his way to the podium and hollered (not quietly I might add) rubbish into the microphone. All while a huge dinner and program was taking place in the gym. I am sure they heard everything. Yeah, we are awesome parents.

Things I never thought I'd say....

Walker, Dad is not going to teach you how to say BUTT FACE in Korean so quit asking.

No Whitney, the Bishop will not accept fake gemstones at tithing settlement. Go get your real money.

Wyatt, I am not sure if Mr. Bubbles (the freaky pet monkey) is still alive, even though his owner Michael Jackson is not. (We seriously have a daily Mickael Jackson conversation with this child. How did he ever find out about Mr. Bubbles anyway?)

Just because you ate all the candy off your advent calender (20 days early...oink, oink) doesn't mean that tomorrow is Christmas.

Today was quite the day. I am tired, but happy. They are now ALL in bed. Phew!

Dancing with the Stars

Whitney loves Dancing with the Stars...(inappropriate as it is....It does make me feel better that while she is subjected to the lack of morals that our country enjoys, the plethora of immodesty is mentioned.)

The final show is tonight and she was officially bribed. The basement needed a tidy-up. During the process Wyatt was told by the oldest that the Dancing Show was about Army Guys and Machine Guns. Consequently, the basement was cleaned in record time.

The disappointment was thick when the show started.

"Mom, I am so mad....This show is not about about cool things. It is about naked girls in bikinis dancing with boys. Gross."

Wyatt buddy, you are incredibly correct. Go enjoy something manly in the clean basement.
Walker, you are in trouble man.

Please pass me a new box of Kleenex and some Tylenol for my cry headache.

I just finished watching ABC's Find My Family and seriously cried like a big fat baby.

I am thankful for the insight I was given tonight. Adoptions bless so many families and I in awe of amazing birth parents who are incredibly unselfish. I cannot imagine anything more heart wrenching than giving up a baby. I am happy about the sweet reunion that I witnessed tonight.

Trust me, my couch will enjoy an indent and a pile of used tissues next Monday night.

How does JEFF (and the rest of us Johnsons) survive the NIGHT SHIFT?

Well....he has given up on those cute little orange foam ear plugs to moved on to ear "PROTECTION." He is ingenious and sleeps through anything.... We practically could move our bedroom next door to the shooting range. Not only is he immune to the normal kid noises, but to AK-47's, monster truck shows and even dump trucks driving through a Nitroglycerin plant.

Super Saturday

***Woke up today...to a blanket of snow.
***Felt happy....and told myself I will NEVER go as long (aka as hideous, shaggy, or trashy) as I did without a haircut.
***Love the new do...AND love the Styling Chic that does it.

 

***Felt like pulling the Christmas Decor out of the basement...
***Decided to hold my horses and NOT skip out on being Thankful.
***Found a treasure from Mr. 5 Year Old....Wy, I "LIKE YOU" too!

 

***Was entertained for 30 seconds when Wes danced into the room equipped as a princess. (Dress and Tiara included.) He squealed with delight in a high pitched voice "I'm a princess!" Then ripped it all of in no time flat, threw it on the floor and gruffly said, "No....I'm a Boy!"
***Cackled to myself when Jeff and Walker braved the cold in the garage to create a CAT HOUSE. (Slow down, not a "CAT HOUSE" like those in Nevada...but a real cat shelter for our blessed gully cat, Gary.) He is the ultimate pet that is kind enough to eat leftovers and the cheapest cat food we can shove in our grocery cart. To show our appreciation for his greatness, this piece of work was constructed to keep him warm this winter out of scraps from the garage...(Precious left-over bead board from the basement and carpet pad that Walker dug out of the dumpster when I wasn't looking. The pad has been shoved in a secret corner of his closet out of my view for this blessed occasion.)
***Was uber-generous (as always when it comes to our pets) and gave up a scratchy old wedding present towel that has taken up space in the linen closet. It has MY name embroidered on it...If it ever blows away in a freak storm and is found by an unsuspecting neighbor I will die of embarrassment. My name is not that common. More pictures to come...trust me.

 

***Found myself writing a note to a 2nd grade teacher.
(Dear Mrs. Bystrom,My doter is sick. She can not go to scool today. Sind My Mom)
***Misspelled lots of words and signed my name, "My Mom" Ha, Ha, Ha!

 

***Went on a 30 minute date with Jeff. I love, love, love that my kids are getting old enough to leave for a short amount of time.
***Romanced at the Gas station, Lowe's, and the Taco Guy. On the way home we just about wrecked the truck on an icy road as Jeff (the driver) shoved his TACO into his Pie Hole.
***Swore, laughed, put it in 4 wheel drive and then swallowed our last bites.
***Was blown away when at dinner Walker gulped down his milk, coughed and laughed simultaneously and showered us all. I had vivid flashbacks from lunch at Robert Stuart Jr. High.
***Seriously scowled and then watched him play Cinderella!
And last of all...
***Checked out the "Buzz Cut." It lives....and I am dying!!!! (Just for the record it is blonde but flourishing.)

Walker stayed home from school today. Our family has been sickly this fall. We continue to share germs and pass the misfortune around. His sniffling company however was very much enjoyed.

We were also pleased to get some insight on some of his classmates.
---Mom, did you know that "So and So" already has Zits?

---Yes as a matter of fact I did. "So and So" is a girl and remember that girl's bodies change faster than boy's. You just wait your turn. (Poor Kid)

---You know that I am already starting to change!

---(I am sure that a sheer look of Horror hit me in the face....I want to be able to be honest with him and him with me, but I was definitely unprepared this morning.) GULP.. you have? (Anticipating things to get a tad uncomfortable)

---Yeah. I am getting little hairs in my armpits. Just a little bit though. It's kinda like a BUZZ CUT in there!

Is he really getting to be that old? I may make Jeff investigate!

Thankful....

This morning I am thankful for my little buddy. What will I do when they grow up and ALL leave for school?

 

The Runner Up's!

Yes, Halloween is over.....But, the costume possibilities for our 5 year old are worth mentioning. He changed his mind over a dozen times. Harry Potter, a King and a Pirate were discussed but not pictured. The Nerd was originally put together with this little one in mind, but after all it was too "nerdy" for him.

 

My personal favorite was good ole M.J. since the nose can be mirrored with ease...It just didn't seem like the best option for a Kindergartner (We didn't want to sick anyone out and after all Kindergarten is a safe place for little boys!) Although one hand would have stayed warm, and he would have tolerated a black wig, Wyatt's nose would have become really tired by the end of the night. Here's to another year! (I need to start looking for some clear nose pinchers that swimmers use. That ought to do the trick!)

 

I don't think he was steered wrong with his final choice. (I look like a decent Mom by saying "his choice". In all reality, he ran out of time to change his mind again!) Obi One floated his boat...and mine too!

 

H- A- double L- O- doubleU- doubleE- N- spells HALLOWEEN

The Nerd, Punk Rocker Chic, ObiWon and the Albino Mace Windu/Padawan Learner made their rounds tonight. Not only at the Trunk or Treat (where we spotted the Mall Cop on a Segway, and were convinced that Michael Jackson may still be alive) but around our neighborhood. It was a great night that ended early to my pleasure after handing out 300+ pieces of candy, in addition to some of Windu's and anything else we could find hiding in the cupboards, the lights were turned off and the peace resumed. (We have the joy of living next to Mr. Clark Griswold who enjoys Halloween just as much as Christmas. He entices the entire county onto our street!)
The Crew!

 

Whitney Girl. (I loved her costume this year because we seriously dressed her in half her closet and then called it good!) Her favorite part? Big earrings. Hands Down!

 

No explanation needed. Played the part perfectly! Glasses furnished by Jeff's personal highschool stash. They are almost as big as Walker's Head. Downfall to Walker's attire? Suspenders that gave him a wedgie half the night!

 

 

Padawan learners of course have thin mustaches! Thanks for asking. He is almost 3 you know.

 

Spoke up when he had his fill of Trick or Treating. He wanted to stay home and hand out candy to everyone, because it made him feel like a "good boy!" Oh he makes me smile.

 

And last of all this beauty needs a little showcasing... brought along by some very "creative" soul to the Trunk or Treat, at the Church I might add, for our enjoyment. The Cow tongue was not enjoyed by our family. Seriously, it was grotesque. Growing up I saw a few too many cow tongues digging snot out of their owners nose! Bad visual, I know. It is all that I could think about with that in my presence. EWWWW!

 

Halloween just isn't Halloween without the obligatory pumpkin gut and carve. Walker and Whitney designed and carved their pumpkins without almost any assistance. Sniff. Where has the time gone?

 

Wes sporting his pumpkin carved watermelon style.

 

I love this 5 year old.

 

Super model Whitney had hippie day for Red Ribbon Week at school... hence the peace sign. She carved her pumpkin's mouth to look like hers. Big front teeth without neighbors!

 

Jeff pulling out the power tools for perfectly round eyes....Although some of the clean up gave me flashbacks to the time I shredded meat with beaters....

 

And Walker...we neglected a picture of you all by your lonesome with your ingenious alien creature. I love you just the same.

I am in a "what the heck am I going to make for dinner" slump! I need to be more like my Mom when it comes to Sunday Dinner. Her Sunday dinners were always amazing. I am depriving my kids....and I think I am just lazy! Sister's Cafe never disappoints so last minute before church I threw ingredients for THIS recipe in the Crock Pot.

I did not however have chicken, or corn. (Hello....I know I was missing 2 out of the 4 ingredients, but maybe that is why Wyatt calls me number blind.) I used a small pork roast from Costco and we did without the corn. I also added 1 tsp of cumin. It was de-lish served with tortilla chips, cheese and sour cream!

And before I forget to mention....one of Jeff's Facebook friends mentioned that when you shred meat use your hand mixer!
What THE?????
Ok, I admit I used it. It grossed me and gave me a hankering for my Billy Bob Teeth, overalls, messy hair that has not been brushed for a week and half dressed dirty kids running around chasing 3 dogs. But I might add it worked really, really well.

4 things I learned today.....

While practicing the piano, a 10 year old may try to get away with practicing his piano while SIMULTANEOUSLY listing to his MP3. I was tipped off because he was playing louder than usual. HammmHmmmm.....

8 year olds love to skate! Today Whit was taken skating for the very first time by a friend and her mother. She was elated and described her afternoon as the BEST DAY EVER. (I am a lazy mother and have pretty much refused, as well as deprived her of perfecting her skating abilities.... or you could say that I am sheltering her from cheesy music and embarrassment while attempting the limbo!) Anyway, a good friend took pity on my daughter and in return was called "SISTER" G. instead of "MRS." G. the whole time! Can we count that as a missionary experience?

My favorite Kindergartner thinks that I am "Number Blind." I miss counted something that he was holding and therefore received that label.

Sweep the kitchen floor AFTER the youngest eats a crumbly muffin. His complexion is a little fair for a sweat-shop underage laborer, but he is a master with the dirt devil hand vac. Oh, and I must not forget... He still needs a nap!

Now that SUMMER,
(that is going in the Johnson Record Books as being THE POOPIEST ever)
is over and we are enjoying FALL and all of it's glory.....

(Disclaimer---"Poopiest" is being used very, very lightly in this case......it really should be described as a whole slurr of naughty words that I know how to say, but will pretend that I am more refined as to have never had a fowl word escape my tongue... Cough, Cough....)

I need to find myself enjoying and loving the simple things in life again. Hence, THE BLOG, that I ADORE, needs to be attended to. I am fighting to be DELICIOUSLY HAPPY like my hilarious 5 year old with his new found love of Kindergarten.....


I am however, going to join the PRIVATE bandwagon. I really am serious this time! No more idle threats I tell ya!

Please send me your email for an invite!

60+++

Just a note....the beginning of this summer has been rainy and fun, but I have put 60+ miles on my car the last 2 days (that is a total of about 130 miles) running kids around to swimming lessons, football camp, t-ball, baseball practice (2x a day), friends houses...etc. I am ready for the weekend. It is scheduled to be much calmer, I hope. Breathe.

20 for Today

Here are some highlights from this exciting and crazy week!

WALKER....
-The science project

 

-Busy with baseball every night of the week!

 

-"Ride Bikes to School Gang"

 

-Photo OP with his amazing 4th grade teacher on the LAST DAY OF SCHOOL!

 

-Haircut that was overdue by a MONTH just in time for his talk in Primary today! You look so much cleaner...I love it! Oh and great job on your talk about Baptism and the Holy Ghost. Makes me happy to hear you!

 

WHITNEY....
-Filling up camera memory cards like they are going out of style. I love this self portrait Whit!

 

-Finished up her amazing soccer season. She ripped it up this spring with almost 20 goals in her 7 games. (She has a bad blogger mom who has not posted successes.) She is fast, tenacious and a blast to watch!

 

-Performed Twinkle Twinkle and Edelweiss for her 1st grade class. IM-pressive!

 

-Posed for the last day of school photo.

 

-Said Goodbye to her fun teacher and 1st Grade.

 

WYATT....
-Ummm...no really good explanation, just 100% Wyatt.

 

-Play dates with friends. Hilarious boys.

 

 

-Is painfully learning to ride his bike! More crying than riding was accomplished, but his Dad is determined. (We have some awesome first date video!)

 

 

-Saved money and purchased his very own razor scooter. Wyatt=Elated (Unfortunately not pictured yet!)

-Surprised me with a teeny tiny but beautiful flower (about the size of a clover) packaged nicely inside a huge manila envelope. Struck me as incredibly funny. What a thoughtful boy...we may need a talk because I think it is from the neighbors yard. Oops.

 

WES....
-Seems to keep busy and happy at all of his siblings sporting events....

 

-Starting to love to color. This day was especially messy.

 

-Dislikes naps and quite time. We take them when we can get them.

 

-Monkey see---Monkey do

 

-Is the happy subject of Whitney's photography. Although, he has forced us to purchase child proof doorknob covers. He has learned to escape, and the majority of the time he is half naked. We are so trashy!